Ah, the classic parenting conundrum: the older kids are finally playing together (for once, without WWE-style takedowns), and your toddler senses a disturbance in the Force.
Suddenly, they need your undivided attention, their own snacks, and possibly a parade.
Juggling siblings of different ages can feel like refereeing a football match and a tea party at the same time—sans whistle and with a lot more crumbs.
If you’ve ever tried to keep a determined two-year-old occupied while the big kids ride bikes, build Lego kingdoms, or host an elaborate living room dance-off, you know exactly what I mean.
Good news: a few clever tricks can buy you those precious, peaceful minutes, and maybe even save your sanity. Or at least your coffee.
Here’s how to keep your toddler busy and happy (or at least not smearing jam on the dog) while the older kids play.
1. Busy Baskets: Your Secret Weapon
Imagine a basket so captivating, it can distract a toddler from making a beeline for their sibling’s elaborate block tower. Enter the magical world of busy baskets.
Fill a small container with objects that are safe, interesting, and slightly novel. Think measuring cups, chunky wooden puzzles, textured balls, or big buttons.
Rotating items keeps things fresh. Every week or two, sneak a couple out and swap in something new—maybe a scarf with fun colours, a set of stacking cups, or a squishy book with crinkly pages.
Choose items that match your toddler’s developmental stage—no choking hazards, please. For the tactile-obsessed, a basket with an old wallet full of expired cards and a zip-up coin purse can provide minutes (plural!) of rummaging fun.
Montessori educators have long championed the idea that open-ended, real-life objects are more engaging than yet another plastic gizmo that plays ‘Old MacDonald’ on repeat (here’s why open-ended play matters).
Keep your busy basket tucked away except when you really need it. Scarcity, in this case, is pure gold.
2. Snacktivity Time
A snack can occupy a toddler’s hands, mouth, and attention. Combine it with a bit of novelty and you’ve got a snacktivity—a snack that doubles as an activity.
Set them up with a muffin tin and a selection of bite-sized nibbles: blueberries, oat cereal hoops, grated cheese, or rice cakes snapped in half.
Invite your little one to transfer, sort, squish, or build edible towers. (Warning: the dog may also volunteer for quality control.)
For a more ambitious day, try “paint your own rice cake” with a little dish of natural yoghurt and a clean brush. They’ll feel like an artist, you’ll feel like a genius, and the older kids will probably want to join in, too.
Just maybe keep the actual paints out of reach. Unless you fancy a Pollock-inspired kitchen.
Mindful eating activities not only distract but also nurture fine motor skills, according to research from the University of Michigan. Just don’t expect miracles: this is a toddler, not a Zen monk.
3. Stuck-On Fun with Stickers (And Tape!)
Sticker books and washi tape are the unsung heroes of distraction. Peel-and-stick activities can be set up on a tray, highchair, or even on a low window for a vertical challenge.
Opt for re-stickable stickers (less heartbreak when they want to move that dinosaur for the tenth time) or a chunky roll of washi tape. The act of peeling, positioning, and re-peeling is oddly soothing, even for adults.
Try sticking a big sheet of paper to the table and show your child how to make patterns, faces, or—if you’re feeling wild—“roads” for toy cars.
Some parents even pre-peel a few stickers so tiny fingers can get started right away. Bonus: picking up little bits of tape is Olympic-level pincer grasp practice.
This low-mess activity is a favourite among occupational therapists who work with young children, as sticker play helps build fine motor strength and hand-eye coordination (more on sticker play and development here).
4. Water Play, Minus the Flood
Water play doesn’t have to end in the Great Kitchen Flood of 2024. With a bit of creative containment, you can offer a sensory-rich experience that buys you time while the older crew sets up their elaborate Barbie-rescue mission.
Set your toddler up at the table or on a washable mat with a small bowl of water (think cereal-sized, not paddling pool). Add a sponge, a couple of cups, a paintbrush, or even plastic animals for a ‘bath’.
Pop a towel underneath for any splashy mishaps. If you’ve got a conservatory or garden, a washing-up bowl on the grass can work wonders.
For extra magic, freeze a few plastic toys inside an ice block the night before, and hand your child a spoon and warm water for “excavation.” Expect a look of awe, and a good ten minutes of concentration.
Even a simple spray bottle is captivating for the under-threes. Spritzing leaves, windows, or the side of the bath is practically a toddler spa day.
According to pediatrician Dr. Laura Markham, water play is not only calming, it helps toddlers learn about cause and effect. Just be prepared for some “Why is everything wet?” questions later.
5. The ‘Special Toddlers-Only’ Zone
Toddlers love to feel included, but sometimes what they really crave is their own little world. Creating a “special zone” just for them can do wonders.
It doesn’t take much. A pop-up tent in the corner, a laundry basket lined with cushions, or a blanket draped over two chairs makes an instant hideaway.
Fill their den with a few soft toys, some favourite books, and maybe a torch or fairy lights (battery operated, of course). Announce it as the “no big kids allowed” zone, and watch your toddler’s eyes light up.
This strategy appeals to children’s innate need for autonomy (see child psychologist Dr. Mary Ainsworth’s attachment theory), making them feel special and in control—even if it’s just over a pile of teddies.
Rotate the contents or invite them to decorate with safe items, and the novelty will last longer than your last cup of hot tea.
If you’re feeling fancy, give their special place a name—“Cosy Cave,” “Teddy Towers,” or “Snack Shack.” Invite them in with a flourish, then retreat quietly and enjoy a few minutes of peace.
For Those Days When Nothing Works
Let’s be honest: some days, no trick, basket, or sticker in the world will keep a toddler from launching themselves, shrieking, into the big kids’ game. That’s OK.
Toddlers are built to test boundaries, seek company, and crash sibling parties.
Try to keep a sense of humour about it (and maybe a secret chocolate stash for yourself). Tomorrow, you can dust off the busy basket and try again.
Parenting is the ultimate improv show: sometimes you win, sometimes you end up with peas in your shoes.
Hang in there, you clever, resourceful human. And if all else fails, there’s always CBeebies.
