Phones. They’re convenient, always at hand, and often the only reason you make it through a grocery shop with your sanity intact. But behind that tiny glowing screen lurk some truly epic parenting pitfalls.
If your child’s phone habits are starting to resemble a caffeine-fuelled squirrel on TikTok, you’re in good company.
Here are the five biggest phone mistakes parents make—complete with solutions you can try before bedtime.
1. Unlimited Screen Time—Because It’s Easier
You’re not alone if you’ve handed over a phone to buy a moment of peace—and then promptly lost track of how long your child’s been scrolling. A few quiet minutes turn into “Wait, why is it dark outside?”
The problem? Kids aren’t known for their self-regulation. The more time they spend glued to screens, the more their brains crave that dopamine hit.
According to child development experts, unrestricted device use has been linked to poorer sleep, higher levels of anxiety, and even changes in the developing brain’s reward system.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends clear boundaries on screen time to help kids avoid the rabbit hole of endless scrolling.
It’s tempting to let the phone do the babysitting—especially after a workday that’s drained your last ounce of patience. But setting and enforcing clear time limits, even if it’s just after dinner or before bedtime, works wonders.
Bonus points for using built-in screen time controls or parental apps to help you stick to your own rules (because yes, they’ll notice if you cheat).
Try this tonight: Announce a phone-free hour, stash devices in a basket, and do something gloriously analog. Board game, anyone?
Or if all else fails: forced family karaoke.
2. No Rules About Where or When
Phones at the dinner table? In the bathroom? Under the covers at midnight? If your household doesn’t have any designated “no-phone” zones or times, your child’s phone may never leave their side.
Why’s that a problem? Kids (and let’s be honest, adults too) need boundaries to develop healthy relationships with their devices.
Without rules, screens can worm their way into every waking moment, disrupting sleep and making it harder for kids to engage with the real world.
A recent study revealed that late-night screen use is strongly associated with sleep deprivation and increased stress in children and teens.
What works: Pick a few sacred spots or times—maybe no phones in bedrooms, or all devices off an hour before lights out. If you’re feeling brave, try a “tech-free meal” rule.
Yes, you’ll get some whining. No, it doesn’t mean you’re a tyrant. It means you’re actually helping your child’s brain and mood.
Tonight’s challenge: Declare the dinner table a phone-free fortress. The cat doesn’t count.
3. Using Phones as a Bribe or Punishment
“If you finish your veggies, you can have your phone!” Sound familiar? Many parents use devices as leverage: reward for good behavior, or punishment when chores aren’t done.
It’s an easy currency—phones are powerful motivators, after all.
Unfortunately, this strategy can backfire. Research suggests that making phones a primary reward or punishment only increases their allure.
It sends the message: This device is so incredibly valuable, it must be the ultimate prize (or the ultimate loss). Cue obsession.
Psychologists encourage parents to focus on consistent, non-tech-based rewards—like extra story time, park visits, or those rare unicorn moments of uninterrupted parental attention.
Try swapping the phone for something less techy and more tangible. Instead of saying, “No phone until you finish your maths worksheet,” try, “Let’s play outside once you’re done.” The world will not end.
Your child might grumble, but the link between good behaviour and screen time will start to weaken.
Test drive: Pick one behaviour and reward it with something that doesn’t require a charger.
4. Not Modelling Healthy Phone Habits
Ever sneak a peek at your phone during a family movie? Guilty as charged.
Kids are expert copycats. If they see Mum or Dad glued to a screen at every spare moment—checking emails during breakfast, scrolling through social feeds at stoplights—they’ll assume this is normal.
Research from Common Sense Media shows that children whose parents maintain healthy tech boundaries are far more likely to do the same.
It’s tough—phones are everywhere, and sometimes we really are checking something vital (like whether the local pizza place delivers after 9pm).
But if you want your child to think there’s life beyond the screen, you’ve got to show them. Put your own device away during family time. Announce, “I’m switching off now,” and mean it.
Even small gestures—like leaving your phone outside the bedroom—send a clear message.
Tonight’s experiment: Challenge yourself to go phone-free for one hour while the kids are around. See if anyone notices (spoiler: they will).
5. Ignoring What Kids Are Doing on Their Phones
Handing over a device, assuming it’s all educational games and the odd episode of “Bluey,” is a little like setting your child loose in a massive shopping centre and hoping they’ll only visit the library.
The internet is vast, and not always friendly.
Kids may stumble onto content meant for older audiences, get bombarded by sneaky ads, or chat with people who aren’t who they seem.
According to a report from the UK Safer Internet Centre, a significant proportion of children encounter inappropriate content, cyberbullying, or online pressure long before parents realize.
You don’t have to turn into the device police, interrogating your child after every session. Instead, try open-ended questions. Show genuine interest in their favourite apps or games.
Play together—yes, even if it means pretending to care about pixelated sheep or virtual slime. Many parental controls let you set app limits or get a weekly snapshot of what’s been happening on the device.
Tonight’s mission: Ask your child to show you their three favourite apps or videos. You might be surprised by what you discover—and it’s a brilliant way to get the conversation rolling.
Raising Kids Who Can Unplug
Phones aren’t going anywhere, and neither are the kids who love them. With a few simple rule tweaks and a bit of creativity, your family can avoid the worst of the screen-time spiral.
No need for guilt—every parent’s made these mistakes (some of us by breakfast).
Next time your child begs for “just five more minutes,” you’ll have some new tricks up your sleeve—and maybe, just maybe, a few more unplugged moments together.
