Ever wished you could read your nanny’s mind? Busy parents, meet your cheat sheet.
Here’s what top-notch nannies around the world secretly (and not-so-secretly) hope you’ll knock off, so they can be the superstars you hired them to be—and everyone’s happier for it.
1. Micromanaging Every Move
Hovering over your nanny while she slices grapes or tracking routines via a 34-page manual may feel reassuring, but it’s the quickest way to turn your Mary Poppins into a stressed-out Mary Popp-off.
Great nannies aren’t just babysitters—they’re professionals, often with years of experience, child development courses under their belts, and a sixth sense for toddler tantrum weather.
Research from the International Nanny Association confirms that empowering nannies to make decisions within reasonable boundaries leads not only to happier caregivers but to more secure, adaptable children.
Want your child to thrive? Share your key routines and safety non-negotiables, then step back. If your hired help wants to introduce a new snack or change story time to after lunch, trust that she’s got her reasons.
You’re not just paying for an extra set of hands; you’re hiring judgment, creativity, and calm in chaos. Let the pro be a pro.
2. Leaving the House a Disaster Zone
Nannies expect a little mess—sticky fingerprints, creative explosions of Duplo, and the occasional banana in the shoe bin.
But walking into a home that looks like it’s been hit by a cyclone (dirty dishes in every room, laundry mountain threatening an avalanche, yesterday’s dinner fossilizing on the highchair) is another story.
Here’s the rub: when a nanny spends half her shift clearing last night’s carnage just to find a clean surface for this morning’s breakfast, that’s time your child isn’t getting stories, games, or fresh air.
Parenting is full-on. Everyone gets it. Just commit to a 10-minute evening blitz: load the dishwasher, stash the laundry, corral the toys. You’re not striving for a show home—just a launching pad for the day.
Your nanny will actually have time for the meaningful stuff, and you’ll come home to a house that doesn’t look like a sitcom set in ‘the before times.’
3. Sending Mixed Signals about Discipline
Ever told your nanny that screen time is strictly for emergencies, but then turn on Bluey to get through your own morning routine? Or asked her to enforce a ‘no sweets’ rule, then hand your child a packet of biscuits as you walk out the door?
Mixed messages don’t just baffle nannies—they leave kids confused, too.
Children are world-class boundary testers. If they spot an inconsistency, they’ll play both sides like tiny politicians in nappies. And your nanny? She gets cast as the ‘mean one,’ while you’re the hero with the treats.
Agreement on discipline is essential. The American Academy of Pediatrics points out that consistency is key to helping children feel secure and learn appropriate behavior.
Have a sit-down (snacks help) and hash out the rules together. Then, back each other up—even if you’re tempted to bend for a bit of peace. Your nanny will feel like a teammate, and your child will know exactly where the goalposts are.
4. Treating Your Nanny Like a Housekeeper
Nannies love kids. They signed up for cuddles, crafts, and the sort of parkour that involves leaping across Lego fortresses.
What they did not sign up for is scrubbing your loo or folding your pants—unless this has been clearly agreed in advance, with fair pay to match.
Blurring the lines leaves nannies feeling taken for granted, or worse, unappreciated. A survey at Care.com revealed that additional, unexpected chores are a top gripe among nannies—and a fast route to burnout or resignation.
Want your nanny to stick around? Define the job scope during hiring, and revisit it yearly. If you’re in a pinch and need help with extra laundry, just ask (nicely) and adjust pay as needed.
The answer might be yes—or a gentle ‘I’ll do what I can once the children are sorted.’ A little respect goes a long way.
5. Skipping the Small Stuff (That’s Actually Huge)
Nannies are human, not robots. Birthdays, sick days, and the odd rough morning happen.
Forgetting to ask, “How are you?” or neglecting to say thanks after a long day sends the message that your nanny is just another appliance—handy, but invisible.
On the other hand, remembering her birthday, leaving a cuppa on the counter, or texting a quick “Hope you’re feeling better” when she’s under the weather creates loyalty and warmth that can’t be faked.
A 2022 Harvard Business Review study found that regular recognition—yes, even small gestures—has an outsized effect on job satisfaction and performance. Turns out, what makes a workplace lovely for you works wonders for nannies, too.
A little kindness doesn’t just buy goodwill. It means your nanny is more likely to pitch in during emergencies, stay late without grumbling, or whip up a last-minute science project when you forget about the school theme day.
Teamwork Makes the Dream Work
Every parent wants a nanny who adores their child and sticks around long enough to see them through to school, or at least the end of the teething phase.
Listening to your nanny’s (sometimes unspoken) wishes isn’t about giving up control—it’s about building a true partnership.
After all, you’re both in the business of raising marvellous humans. When you trust their expertise, respect their boundaries, keep the house halfway navigable, and share appreciation a little more freely, you don’t just get a happier nanny.
You get calmer kids, a less harried home, and the rarest prize of all: a parenting win you didn’t even have to orchestrate yourself.
Go on, put the kettle on. Your nanny (and your sanity) will thank you.
